Week 1 has come and gone. Nail biter all the  way to the end. On our week back we had a lot of drama but i don’t think any of us can be too disappointed because waivers are hot…

Here is your review.

This was the only blowout of the week, which is good. But Smith probably respectfully disagrees, Smith wants us to know his team is good. And like a shark attacking a seal, when blood is in the water you know it’s already over… by the afternoon games… While Smith looks onto waivers with slight indifference, Russ will be desperate for that gem, that season saver… and he needs it, have you seen that bench? Fucking terrible.

But you weren’t the worst this week.

Not breaking 100 week one should like land you in Guantánamo…like i said after your draft, your team looks washed up. You need Michael Thomas back tomorrow it’s so bad… but that’s okay… it’s only week one and I’ve been wrong before. The two of you better do some research for which waiver pick might just save your team… Cubby’s team had a better week than what could be assumed when you realize he started Rodgers. Swift looked good even along side Williams, and the rest of the team did a fair job. Good start champ. Maybe look into a QB.

This was a kick in the nuts and then a slap in the face huh, Jake? On paper i think Kevin’s team had a lot more question marks than Jake’s. But ultimately it came down to the Chicago Bears and Matt Nagy to let you down… they let Andy Dalton poopoo on your hopes and dreams and through scraps to Robinson… but Green Bay didn’t help you either with your star 2nd round pick… This doesn’t necessarily bode well for Kevin either, a team that is desperate for a good waiver wire RB pick up might miss him this far back in waivers. Where Jake seems to be better off with high upside bench players. Both teams put up respectable point totals.

Another Monday night decides it all kind of game and uhh it was decided pretty quickly. Ty’son chicken nuggets can play. He’s not an every down back but he’ll score you a beautiful TD in the first quarter while we watched a now-FatCat Mark Andrews flop around like a fish for 3 hours. I don’t know why but the second Jeudy got bootied i knew Naughton was gonna lose. The Shiva Gods may be cruel but they are poetic. 

Sidebar: I think Matt will need a week or three before his team really starts cooking so a week where Gesicki and Najee go missing and he manages a victory is pretty good. Thanks for respecting the sidebar.

Rarely do i save myself for last in reviews but here we are. What a night. The end to this match up was wild. I think we had at least 5 lead changes throughout the night with a 3 possession OT which favored the raiders… Josh made the right call with Jacobs and it was a battle. But Josh was right on Sunday when he reminded me that Hill, Waller and Monty still had to play. It was a great matchup and hope it’s as good later in the season for our rematch…where i will kick your ass. 

And that’s my review… 

Here are my comparisons

Matt: Thatcher

Never in any doubt, this guys is essential and just makes everything easier on everyone else. He’s a technical masterclass but sometimes you just need a little brute force but that’s just not you….

Naughton: Blackbeard 

Every time a new siege player joins they look at Blackbeard and think this guy looks like he could do a job… However he just sits behind this pissweak shield of “i was about to say that” and hopes it doesn’t break under minimal pressure. 

Russ: Fuze

Who knew that this guy’s personality could translate to his actual main… All Force, no Grace is right… in the right situation this guy is gonna pack a punch but in the wrong situation he’s gonna kill you and himself. Total 50/50 shot if this guy is gonna be good at any given time.

Cubby: Amaru 

This guy is the opposite of “a part of the furniture”, when you see him in your party you know it’s definitely not going to be a typical round… whether that’s a good or bad thing honestly you’ll never know. Is this bitch flying through a window getting a headshot or his she going to break through a window and immediately step on a frost trap. My bet is on the latter.

Kevin: Ash

Another person who’s main is their comp… in terms of kicking ass this guys got it in spades. Wanna be the best? you better get some reps in with this fucker because she’s a champ… but this season she might be as low as Sacko Bowl Tier.

Smith: Finka

You gonna tell me that boost isnt just liquid coke that you shoot directly into your veins? Cause it is. No matter how much the meta changes you’ll always have a function in this league. Hey, i need a bump. 

Jake: Buck

Like Jake, Buck likes to fuck. All-round kick ass, great guns, hard breach, and a soft breach for literally any angle. But this guy competes with some big guns, with various skills that give them the edge. Maybe someday this guy will be top tier but right now you’re blowing 1v1s in game 9 against Amaru who has one kill and seven deaths.

Josh: Capitao 

Besides the obvious, he’s old and you’re old… this guy is pretty decent under the right circumstances and can hold his own in many situations. On paper this guy has a good gun and gadget with widespread and decent utility… however he’s just never even been in spitting distance to top tier and idk if he ever will. F’s in the chat for Aaron Jones 

Tyles: Blitz

Here’s the wrap with this guy… he’s got two sides, a side that is frustratingly difficult to deal with and a side that is a complete joke. Shooting his flashy lights in my face distracting me, but we all know he hasn’t done the research to play a character that requires a partner. 

Drew: Nomad 

I’m a lone wolf… A traveler and not from that shit hole place known as St. Charles. I am a bit of a coin toss when it comes to me being 100% effective. Some rounds i am next from the bottom and other times I’m top cock… oh and I’m loud as fuck when you trigger my balloons (straight facts (opinions))