Week 2
Smith vs Josh
I am writing this before the Monday game and therefor praying to God that Josh’s 3 players left score less than 20 total… but still this will probably be the largest margin of victory. Smith i has once again put on a show of fucking dominance. His team is squared away back to front. His only issue so far is not playing Gronk but instead playing Kittle…good problem to have! His team is so much better than everyone else’s at this current juncture. Josh i hope waivers works out for you.
Redacted. Jones scoring 4 TDs really just made all of this worse… fucking hell.
Drew vs Kevin
Ego was hurt this week boys. It’s never good to underperform like this because it just makes you look bad on almost all fronts… People have bad weeks and i have some diversity in other leagues with similar shitty points totals and most were due to gamescripts… HOWEVER i still sucked booty hole but I’ll bounce back! Kevin might have scored a season winning dub with Kupp on his roster but news flash Kevin, your RBs were worse than mine this week and that’s saying something. I guess good win Champ.
Tyler vs Matt
Welp no matter the situation, there is always a chance Derrik Henry will drop 44 points and if that happens you’re gonna win that game. Matt your team put up a respectable points total but as previously state you couldn’t help but lose against a 40+Burger.
I think everything is not all right on both teams and there remain to be glaring holes on both. But Mclaurin looked electric so there yeah go.
Cubby vs Jake
As of right now Cubby and Jake are tied which pretty much seals the game. Jake losing the Cubby is kind of like a forgone conclusion at this point which is a real shame. However, Jake’s team, like mine was really effected by gamescripts with the only one that went his way was Seattle, but Zach Moss with 2 TDs on the bench is more good then bad. Cubby your team was average last week and average again this week. So everyone brace for Cubby being insufferable “for no raisin”
Naughton vs Russbin
Personally I’d say this was the game of the week. Two 0-1s boxing it out for any sort of victory but it kind of looked like two hobos fighting over a sandwich… Ross the entire time was talking about how if only had started the Bears D… but that just goes to show that Ross almost started his best team…Naughton did start his best team and it was BAD. Evans having a bounce back week was the only thing that made it look possible. Naughton is the only person who played his best possible team and lost… this just really shows his lack of depth. Serious changes need to happen and he has a plethora of problems. 0-2 never looked so sad.
And that’s week 2
Comparisons.
Siege Defenders.
Jake: Goyo
This man has got some drip, you ever see this man in Miami, he’s the only thing hotter than the weather. The only problem is he’s become a bit of a meme… in theory this guy slaps, that shotgun (Lockett) slaps past 30yards but usually i just see you setting yourself on fire by your own gadget. But it’s never not hot when Goyo is around.
Matt: Mute
This man is the technology support guy of the league. A vital part in this ever changing technological world. However what help he brings us could switch at the drop of that bowler hat Thatchy boi wears… he will steal your fucking router and than DDoS your ass and send your internet search history to your coworker’s daughter. Just keep him happy and he’ll assist in keeping the baddies out.
Smith: Cav
The whole point of this character is to play away from the rest of the group. Throughout the course of a match she might indicate to the rest of the players that she’s still alive but it’s almost always brief… but if she can make it to the end of the match with out getting killed she might just impress the rest of the group of her ability. She’s meant to be away from the group because if you were around us all the time it just wouldn’t make sense.
Naughton: Lesion
I mean this Gu boy literally wears Cargo Shorts.
Ross: Tachanka
This boy do be Tachank.
He’s got a gun that punches like DK Metcalf and a fireball grenade launcher that he got in like the third season of this game. This operator is not exactly what we’d call a natural born winner but he’s apart of the culture and fun to play against.
Tyles: Mozzie
This guy is all about the show. He’s flipping his magazines around and the rest of us say “man that’s cool” but your gadget is showing us how the other half lives. You’re living a dream and we just watch it through the drones all around the map showing us footage of people jamming out to your music. Also you’ll probably by a motorcycle soon because why not.
Josh: Kaid
This aged yet distinguished gentleman is often useful in duping unsuspecting players into a confused state with the ol switcharoo by putting your shockyboys on top of the wall. However he is no tactical masterclass. The next time you play him you’ll have him figured out and he never has the guns to go the distance. He does do some audacious ass shit, what’s with the sniper scope pistol?!
Kevin: Jäger
Hate to say it again but this guy is a champ. However he has become less convincing over the years even when he’s winning world championships. Idk if the rest of us have gotten better or if it was a nerf but I’m never convinced until i see him there… they do like a good Oktoberfest beer and often has one when enjoying the game. Also Kevin mains this German bastard.
Cubby: Kapkan
Last minute switch from Echo to Kapkan gives this boy one of his favorites. Playing with you is just one big trap. If we get downed by you it’s like the biggest own ever and it’s so embarrassing. We won’t hear the end of it from you and other players. But these traps can be anywhere and are so sudden it’s like someone derailing a group chat conversation with some cringe ass shit. We all love Kapkan but sometimes we want to ban him.
Drew: Smoke
I’m laying on an air mattress in my office high as balls and I’m going to 420 blaze up with smoke way more. This guy is a champ and although his side arm primary approach is well unorthodox to say the least this guy has proven it can work. Shotgun approach as a backup plan to rotate around his opponents and then desperately hold out against multiple opponents down the stretch. He might not alway get the kill but he probably will get the win when it matters (playoffs)…”Oh look the enemy, I’ll just blast them away with my shotgun, BANG! miss. BANG! miss. *gets killed immediately*”